This is my favorite picture.
OK, so I tried writing about my trip to Mexico and it would have been a book…so I decided for now to focus on what God taught me this time around. This trip was so different than the previous two that I had a hard time nailing down my thoughts on it at first. I really had to spend some time asking God about it and talking through some things with my accountability partner.
In a strange way things were so easy…I was lost. I have to admit I don’t think I have ever been on a trip where I wasn’t in over my head to a point that drove me in tears back to God for grace. I praise the Lord that he didn’t let me walk away from this trip thinking that I just had things together, but instead showed me that He had answered every one of my prayers. It is sad I know, but even after all these years of answered prayers, I still don’t always connect the dots right away.
I also noticed a lack of emotional turmoil during the week. This was strange for me for two reasons. First, I am emotional anyways and second, I have wanted to work and live at a place like Rancho 3M since I was 12. Since the second or third day I set foot on the Ranch, I have wanted to live there. God, obviously, has other plans for me right now and is still showing me that He wants me to wait. This has been a constant battle for me all year, and I expected it to be even harder when I was there. Again, it was strange to me, I was able to connect with the kids, but it didn’t take hold of me like previous years. I was able to pray for them more and in a way felt like I was serving and loving them more than I had previously, yet at the same time without that emotional weight. I found this true in several areas, the game time I organized with the kids, spending time investing in our group, and getting to spend time time with Denise (the directors wife).
As I stepped back after I got home looking at all God had done and my not so emotional response to it, I really had a hard time working through the issues. It wasn’t until I had talked with one of my accountability partners that I started to see what God was doing. Through several things she said I realized that I usually gauge God’s work in my life based on my emotional response to it. As I kept looking back at the week in Mexico I had a hard time seeing God’s work because I had limited it in my mind to a more emotional experience. When I stepped past this wall I began to see how much God had really done. I am still working through some if it, but I am so amazed to see the work He did in my heart. He has really brought me to a place of peace about waiting on His timing for my dreams. He showed me AGAIN how powerful He is and challenged me to grow in my faith. He has given me another long list of how He has showed himself faithful to answer not just some of my prayers, but every single one…even the ones I thought were insignificant. I am challenged to continue my study of who God is so that I will have more faith in his “future grace”.
Well, this is getting long and I am not sure if you can follow my thought pattern here, but these are a couple of areas that God has been working in my life. I pray that by recounting God’s faithfulness, you will be encouraged to seek Him more in your own life and not to limit His power to your own understanding. We serve a great God who is not limited by us or our feeble minds.
To God Be All The Glory!!!